That title might seem confusing… especially since it relates to chickens.

I didn’t buy my pullets as chicks. I bought them as adolescents, so they spent their childhood years (months) solely with other chickens and had minimal human contact. This makes them uncomfortable around humans, at least during the day. That led me to a loophole. When they roost at night, they are trapped in the coop. My idea has been to pet them at night when they were confined, docile, and hypnotized with sleep. I figured this would make them comfortable with human handling.

Then, I started thinking about it from their perspective. Late each night, I:

• Silently approach their chicken tractor
• Turn on a bright flashlight
• Remove their roof
• Proceed to probe at them
• Sometimes there is a cat involved, other times there isn’t
• Replace everything, like nothing ever happened
• Sneak away

That creepy scenario didn’t even include the magic automated chicken door that locks them in at night and lets them out in the morning.

Except for the cat part (I’ve never seen an episode like that), Doesn’t that sound like being on the wrong side of an X-Files episode? From their point of view, I think it might freak them out more then tame them. I just wish I could understand their conversation and what they have been saying around the water bowl. I hope I haven’t traumatized them so badly that we can’t share a laugh about it several years (months) down the road when they are mature adults and have lost their adolescent angst.

Moving forward, I am going to give up on the late night visitation approach for winning their friendship. I am just going to bribe them with meal worms. I bought some today, and those things are like crack for chickens.